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The Afternoon Herald

Deeply serious coverage of things that probably did not happen, times being what they are

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Satire · Life

Walking Club Rules No Member May Leave A Viewpoint Before The Last Reaction Is Filmed

The society has since introduced a rota in which one member is designated each week to look at the scenery on the others' behalf.

Afternoon Edition

The Dapperton Footpath Society has formalised a practice under which no walking group may leave a scenic viewpoint until every member has completed filming their personal response to it.

The rule, adopted at the society's autumn meeting, followed what minutes describe as "several incidents in which members departed before others had finished their second takes". The pause at Hollow Crag last month reportedly lasted longer than the walk to it.

The procedure

At each viewpoint, members take up positions with their backs to the landscape, hold their phones at arm's length, and deliver a short address to camera about what the view means to them. A marshal, appointed on a rotating basis, confirms that each member has captured a usable take before the group moves on.

The society's chairwoman, Mrs Eileen Torrington, said the change was a matter of fairness.

"Before, the quicker walkers would be halfway down the hill while the slower ones were still doing their intros," she said. "Now nobody is left filming alone, which we found was affecting morale and, more importantly, the footage."

Mrs Torrington's own contributions, filmed by her husband in a series of lingering tracking shots, run to several minutes each and include a recurring segment about her boots.

The response

One longtime member, Mr Gerald Puckett, resigned from the society last week after suggesting at a viewpoint that the group might "look at the valley, just for a moment, together". Witnesses said the remark was received in silence, and that three members filmed their reactions to it.

The society has since introduced a weekly rota in which one member is designated to look at the scenery on the others' behalf and report back at the pub afterwards, in a form the group can use.

The walk organiser, Miss Deirdre Vann, defended the practice. "A view you haven't filmed is a view you can't prove you've seen," she said. "When I showed my sister the folder, she understood Dapperton Fell in a way she never could from being here."

The society's next outing is to Weeping Stone summit, where a golden hour is expected. Members have been asked to arrive early, as sunset now competes for attention with a growing waiting list of members filming their anticipation of it.